Views: 50,268   Voters: 59   Comments: 6
Started by: dantes_inferno2003 on January 14, 2009
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There's only like a million of them... They got old after a while, but there's still some pretty funny ones out there. post em if you got em! ( Edited by dantes_inferno2003 )  

Chuck Norris Jokes
Image posted by dantes_inferno2003

How others are voting


perfectharmony97's picks

1. Chuck Norris once kicked a horse in the chin. Its decendants are known today as Giraffes.
2. Chuck Norris wears a live rattlesnake as a condom.
why I chose these

tinete's picks

1. Chuck Norris don't do papper planes he just grabs a real one and throws it away!!!!
2. Someone said Chuck can't do fire with 2 rocks after that HELL was created!!!!
3. A dinossaur messed with Chuck now it's most related animal is a chicken!!!
4. Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.
5. Chuck Norris created GOD because he was bored of being the all mighty!!!
6. Solar eclipse occurs because Chuck looks to the sky and the sun tries to hide from him!!!
7. During Halloween we tell stories about monsters, during the rest of the year monsters tell stories about Chuck Norris.
why I chose these

Anonymous's picks

1. Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.
2. Once, Chuck Norris visited the Virgin Islands. Now they're just the Islands.
3. Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.
4. Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding
5. Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life there.
6. When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
7. people use superman pijamas, superman uses chuck norris pijamas
8. chuck norris lost both his legs in a car accident an managed to walk it off!
9. Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.
10. Chuck Norris once kicked a horse in the chin. Its decendants are known today as Giraffes.
why I chose these

Robert Schwin's picks

1. Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.
2. Chuck Norris can divide by zero.
3. When Chuck Norris falls in water, Chuck Norris doesn't get wet. Water gets Chuck Norris'd.
4. When Chuck Norris was denied an Egg McMuffin at McDonald's because it was 10:35, he roundhouse kicked the store so hard it became a Wendys.
5. Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding
why I chose these

ghettolobster's picks

1. They once made a Chuck Norris toilet paper, but it wouldn't take shit from anybody.
2. Chuck Norris can divide by zero.
3. Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life there.
4. When Chuck Norris falls in water, Chuck Norris doesn't get wet. Water gets Chuck Norris'd.
5. Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.
6. When Chuck Norries does pushups, he doesn't push himself up. He pushes the Earth down.
7. When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
8. Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.
why I chose these

srlong's picks

1. Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.
2. Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.
3. just one tear from Chuck Norris could cure cancer. Unfortunately Chuck never cries
4. Jesus can turn water into wine but Chuck Norris can turn wine into beer.
5. If Chuck Norris wants your opinion, he'll beat it into you.
why I chose these

Anonymous's picks

1. There are no weapons of mass destruction in Iraq, Chuck Norris lives in Oklahoma.
2. When Chuck Norris was denied an Egg McMuffin at McDonald's because it was 10:35, he roundhouse kicked the store so hard it became a Wendys.
3. Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding
why I chose these

georgiepoo's picks

1. Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.
2. There is no order of the universe, only the animals Chuck Norris allows to live.
why I chose these

haleybugd:'s picks

1. Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table, because he only recognizes the element of surprise.
2. When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
3. Once, Chuck Norris visited the Virgin Islands. Now they're just the Islands.
4. Chuck Norris once kicked a horse in the chin. Its decendants are known today as Giraffes.
5. Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding
6. Chuck Norris wears a live rattlesnake as a condom.
7. A Chuck Norris-delivered Roundhouse Kick is the preferred method of execution in 16 states.
8. Chuck Norris doesn't need a woman to procreate. Adult men just walk right out of his penis.
why I chose these

Anonymous's picks

1. They once made a Chuck Norris toilet paper, but it wouldn't take shit from anybody.
2. Chuck Norris can divide by zero.
3. When Chuck Norries does pushups, he doesn't push himself up. He pushes the Earth down.
why I chose these
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