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Started by: karj on February 9, 2011
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Many a fine (and not so much) metal band was lured by the notion of recording a ballad back in the 80s. These dalliances proved a blessing and a curse: often becoming chart-toppers, but cursing the band (and the rest of us) to remember such aberrations for the rest of time. ( Edited by karj )  

Worst Metal Ballads
Image posted by karj
#1

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Oh, my dear, sweet, Ozzy... What were you thinking? This track marks the precise moment when every other member of Sabbath thought, "maybe his departure from the band wasn't the worst thing in the world."
http://www.ozzy.com

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#2

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"I'm on my waaay... I'm on my waaay... to future parody."
http://www.motley.com

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#3

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It would be a stretch (perhaps a sin) to call Europe a "metal" band, but the sheer awfulness of this makes it impossible to ignore.

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#4

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"And all the tears you cried that called my name." Seriously, they just don't write shit like that any longer. (Pity.)
http://www.skidrow.com/%20

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#5

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Add one part slow-mo "band on the road" footage, one part scantily clad woman sporting feathered hair, and four or five lens flares, and you've got *solid* gold.
http://www.poisonweb.com

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#6

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Just add orchestra; greatness assured.
http://www.the-scorpions.com

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#7

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"Guys, we already proved we could write some pretty solid tracks with Runnin' with the Devil, Eruption, and Panama... Isn't it about time to try something else? Like sucking?"
http://www.van-halen.com

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#8

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The return on this sweet little ditty: millions. The price: their self-respect (keep in mind, this is for a bunch of guys who painted cat faces on themselves).
http://www.kissonline.com

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#9

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This wasn't a good idea, even at the time. Then of course, Whitesnake wasn't a good idea, even at the time.
http://www.whitesnake.com

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#10

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When you write stuff like this, you hardly need to keep your band in-tact.
http://www.gunsnroses.com

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